Every man must strive to know himself and to seek meaning in his life by proposing projects and goals to which he feels called and that fill his existence with content.
From a certain age, all this must
already be something quite defined, so that at every moment one can know, with
a minimum of certainty, whether what he does or intends to do sets him apart or
about those goals, makes it easier or difficult for him to be true to himself.
It is curious how many people think
happiness is something reserved for others and very difficult to give in their
own circumstances. We run the risk of thinking that happiness is like a dream
that has nothing to do with ordinary and concrete living. We relate it perhaps
to great events, to being able to have a lot of money, enjoy a seamless health,
have a dazzling professional or affective triumph, star in great achievements
of whatever kind. But the reality then is quite different from that.
The proof is that people who are
richer, more powerful, or more attractive, or better endowed, do not match the
happiest people. To see it, just take a look at the magazines of the heart.
Money and possessions are in themselves a mirage of true happiness. Fame also
doesn't contribute much on its own; Moreover, the famous man needs a special
maturity to know how to assume his birth, without having an emotional imbalance
(in addition, it is the center of attention of many looks, which follow him
very closely and often judge him with special severity).
Nor does it seem that having a great
talent or enjoying very good health are the key point. These are things that
can favor, that can create a climate conducive to feeling happy, but it is not
always so, because we have all seen many examples of very intelligent people
who have completely ruined their lives, or others who, on the contrary, on the
occasion of the disease have discovered a new dimension of their lives and have
matured and been much happier.
Nor is it that to be happy you have
to be foolish, sick or unfortunate. Also among those, as among all, some will
feel happy and others will not. It seems that happiness and unhappiness come
from other things, from things that are more inside the person, in the way his
life proposes.
For example, we often suffer, or
embark as a feeling of discouragement, or agony, or inner fatigue, and there is
no clear external explanation at first glance, because we have had no serious
setbacks, no hunger, no thirst, no sleep, no lack of the health or comforts
that are reasonable.
They are intimate pains, and if we
investigate a little we come to discover that they are caused by ourselves:
many of the complaints we have against life, if we examine ourselves sincerely
and courageously, we realize that they come from our inner state, our laziness,
small selfishness, envy, susceptibility, etc. In short, of personal errors that
give us a disappointment.
However, it must be thought that it
is precisely this disappointment that gives us the opportunity to improve and
be happier. Just as physical pain has the invaluable utility of warning that
something in our body is not going well, those pains we talk about warn us that
something inside us must change. It is positive in addition to natural that we
notice with intensity the weight of our mistakes: if not, it would be very
difficult for us to correct each other.
Perhaps the hardest learning in life
is disappointment: accepting that things starting with the reality of
ourselves are not how we wanted them, as we thought, or as they had been told;
that things aren't that simple, that life isn't that easy. But, the conquest of happiness is not something that is reached
in an impromptu or casual way; it is achieved after a long effort on ourselves,
it is like a work of continuous personal engineering.
